Thursday, March 02, 2006

I was asked the other day if I thought I'd ever get married again. Since the person doing the asking doesn't know me, I delighted them with the answer.

No.

What?!? They asked flabbergastedly.

No.

(blink blink)

But, but, why? They sputtered spittingly.

After I dried myself off, I answered them as honestly as I could.

Been there, done that, divorced it, chopped it up, froze it and fed it to my dogs, 3 times.

They didn't get the humor in the above statement. All I got, again, was

(blink, blink)

But, they asked innocently, aren't you afraid of being alone?

Now it was my turn

(blink, blink)

And in turn, they

(blink, sniff, blink)

*sigh* No, I'm not afraid of being alone. I do better alone, than with someone.

But, how could you do better alone?

Again, me

(blink, blink)

Now, at this point, I'm starting to feel like this is an invasion of my privacy. I'm a very private person. V E R Y. You think not? Who among you knows my full name, address and bra size? That's what I thought.

And because they thought I hadn't heard the question the first time, they repeated it.

*heavy sigh this time* I don't play nicely with others. I don't share well. I don't ask permission. I'm selfish. I'm stubborn. I have a very bad Irish Temper. I tend to blaspheme. At this point, I stopped, looked at them, and asked if that was enough of an answer.

Those aren't reasons to not spend your life with someone!

(blink, blink) OH! Well that's different! You asked me if I was ever going to get married again!
If I meet the right person, whom I think I can get along with and they won't bug me too much about cleaning the bathroom all the time, sure! I'll spend some time with someone!

Needless to say, that wasn't the exact answer they were looking for, and they sashayed away, allowing me to continue with my workout. This entire encounter had me seriously thinking about switching to another gym. The people at this one are far too friendly and talkative. My sweating keeps getting interrupted, and I despise that. I get myself too the gym by berating myself to go, and once I'm there and in my groove, just leave me the fuck alone so I can do my workout and not screw up my rep counts, dammit.

Now, had they asked me if I was afraid of being lonely....well, that would have been an entirely different conversation, one that would have left me a bawling, fetal position, wet, soppy mass on the floor.

But they didn't.

And I'm glad.